Remembering A Natural Birth In Brazil As Little Dove Turns Two

I've been busy baking

Meeting my future husband and giving birth to my first born were great days, but 29th November 2008, the birth of my daughter, was the most brilliant in my life.  She turns two tomorrow and it's got me all nostalgic for the day she arrived...

2 weeks overdue, barely able to move, and doomed to an induction if baby didn't get a move on, I finally started contractions at 5.30am.  By the time I arrived at the hospital I was 10cms dilated and by 7.45am, barely two hours after it all kicked off, I was holding a perfect, piggie-pink newborn in my hands.

My Little Dove, at 4.4kgs  (9.7lbs), was not so little by anyone's standards, but in Brazil she was considered a freaky-monster big baby.  Added to which, she came out the 'normal' way without any drugs.  In the world of Brazilian private hospitals this elevated me into some sort of divinity.  Nurses who had nothing to do with me were dropping in just to take a look at the girl who had birthed baby 'fenomeno' the crazy way.

You see, middle and upper class Brazil is a c-section culture.  I'm not entirely sure why.   Maybe they are terrified.  Maybe it's because Brazilians are climbing social ladders and natural birth is considered unsophisticated and ill befitting a refined individual.  Or maybe it's about Brazil's cult of the body-beautiful; Who would want to damage their nether regions when they can get an invisible bikini-line c-section and a mini tummy tuck at the same time?  Could it really be true that doctors encourage it because they don't want to be inconvenienced by babies arriving at weekends, in the middle of the night or on national holidays?

Whatever the case, everyone from parents to grandparents to nurses and doctors perpetuate this belief that a woman probably shouldn't, couldn't or wouldn't want to birth a baby vaginally, let alone without medication.  When mothers in Brazil go for their first prenatal appointment at 8 weeks, they generally schedule a date for their c-section some 30 weeks later.   The Albert Einstein hospital in Sao Paulo, where I delivered, has a c-section rate of 80%.  Of the 20% that have vaginal births, 99% of those have epidurals.....That makes me one of a very teeny weeny minority to birth the way I did.  Very rare indeed.  

So rare, in fact, that I honestly don't think that the nurses on my shift had seen a natural birth in a very long time, if ever.  Certainly, they had no understanding of why I would want to do such a thing, or what my needs might be.  When I announced that I would not be strapping on any monitors, inserting an IV or having an epidural (there are no other medical pain relief options given here), they started to visibly twitch.  They then started asking me a long list of questions regarding my medical history and looked offended when I gave them the 'talk to the hand not to my face' gesture.  They so rarely see women who are feeling (and trying to manage) painful contractions, and kept urging me to get on the bed to lie down...which is where they are used to seeing (and managing) their mothers.

With my son, I had accepted an epidural from a handsome anesthetist at 9cm dilation (no such thing as too late here) and couldn't feel a thing during his lengthy forceps 'extraction'.  This time, I was determined and well prepared, having read every book ever published in English or French about natural childbirth (tellingly, I never came across one in Portuguese).   I was coaching myself in my head..open, breathe, relax, block out the voices, do what you feel, etc.  Finally, I got the tell-tale 'I need a crap'' feeling that anyone familiar with natural births will recognize as the baby's arrival.  I duly told the nurses what I was feeling and..well, they didn't crack the code.  They helped me get to the bathroom and then, when I started screaming that the baby's head was coming out (into the toilet bowl) they all started screaming too!

It was mass hysteria and my doctor had to shout at them all to get a grip and help me onto the bed.  (Yeah, he had limits...I had to have the baby on the bed...although I did manage to avoid the stirrups).  I had also made it very clear to my doctor that this time, no one was to 'help' me by violently forcing down on my belly as I pushed.  I've heard of this happening to loads of people here, but it seems to be a uniquely Brazilian practice.  I didn't have to worry this time because she shot out like a Champagne cork after 2 pushes, and that was that, the best day in my life and it wasn't even breakfast time...

Happy Birthday my gorgeous big girl.