Wednesday, 26 January 2011

No Clothes Please I'm British

Keeping Cool at Cachoeira da Queda
Too hot.  Can't breathe.  Can't move.  Can't write.  (Did you even miss me?)

Wish you lot in the Northern hemisphere would stop complaining about how cold you are up there.  At least you can just keep adding thermal layers.  Once we're naked, that's it.  That's all we can do, and so that's exactly what we do do.

A few weeks ago I got into the habit of jumping straight out of bed in the morning and into a bikini.  By day four, while untangling a cold, sandy, damp bikini from the bucket and spade in the previous day's beach bag,  I realised I don't have enough beachwear for that habit.  So, I just gave up on apparel altogether.

Mr Becoming has been having a fit at my constant state of undress, convinced there are men climbing trees in the park opposite with telescopes, looking in at me.  He screams 'the shutters are wide open' and expects me to hit the floor.   I suppress the urge to nonchalantly stride up to the window and strike a pose for the peeping toms.  I try to respect his desire to protect my modesty, even though we both know I don't really have any to protect.

Anyway, the only thing that beats getting naked in this heat, is getting wet.  (No, not like that.  Way too hot for anything more than a toe-rub.  Forget it!)  I have a couple of friends with pools but they are currently about as warm and delicious as a urine sample.  There's the sea, obviously, but my favorite way to really chill is to go up to the Parque de Tijuca and swim in one of the natural waterfalls in the forest.

We've been spending the mornings at Cahoeira da Queda, a waterfall surrounded by lush tropical forest.  The water is wonderfully icy and can can even provoke a welcome case of goosebumps, and there is a stony shallow pool where the kids can chase butterflies and collect tadpoles.  (We have adopted four at various stages of metamorphoses though we have no idea what they are...I'm just waiting to have a poisonous tree frog leap into my cereal bowl)

Finally, the most authentically Brazilian way to keep cool in this heat is to take a multiple cold showers a day.  Mr Becoming often takes a shower when he gets up, when he goes to bed and at least once in between.  Until I moved to Rio I was perplexed by this obsession with personal hygiene, but now I'm beginning to see where it comes from, and am beginning to adopt to the incessant showering habit myself.   If nothing else, it's the one place cool enough to allow a toe-rub to get out of hand...


  1. haha! Made me laugh a lot.

    The problem with no clothes at all is a bit hard to talk about on the internet. But it involves sweat in an annoying place that only wearing a brassiere can alleviate.

    Yes? anyone else agree?

  2. Under boob sweat is the worst!

  3. Haha, really liking your blog. Like you, I moved here (Brazil) from England for a Brazilian man, now my husband! It's really nice to find someone in a similar situation to me, and your posts are very amusing!

  4. Oh, and I have to say, I felt the same way about my husband and his over-enthusiastic personal hygeine until I moved here! Does seem a little out of place in England, but living here, I'm right there with him!

  5. Love your blog. I am a Canadian married to a Brazilian.

  6. My Brazilian husband also took multiple showers in the U.S. and seemed to insinuate that my one-shower-a-day might be verging on unhygienic. Now living a summer in Sao Paulo, I also understand the origin of this behavior and I'm up to 2-3 per day. However, being a midwestern girl, and also having gained at least ten pounds since moving here, the nakedness is not a comfortable options for me - however, my husband has no issue and I'm certain has provided high rise neighbors a performance in three cities. No ramifications so far - tell your husband he can probably rest easy.

  7. oh yes, dear

    We, Brazilian women, arent alone....We abandoned Brazil for an American, European, etc.
    I am happy for the opposite.
    But, to change from Brazil to Europe is a little more complicated...


    But...from a warm country like Brazil to a cold country like Sweden...oh, my God!!!!
    Good luck to u and the family.

    Iam counting the days to arrive in Rio...yes..13 days...12...11...10...9.......0....
    Grace Olsson

  8. huaha. this is soo funny! we all brazillians take everyone from the northen countries 4 being kind a dirty people. i'v lived a bit in cold places but even understanding u all, it is still impossible thinking in just one bath by day.. uahua and u think we are obsessed.. uaha i'm really having a good laugh.

    plus, i really think its easier to live in this hotness, even w/ the "get naked and keep hot" situation. i personally prefer taking off clothes, taking more baths, eating some ice or cold water, etc etc.. than putting on clothes and more clothes, getting out in the snow and still feeling cold, but then getting inside anyplace and spending some time taking off all the clothes so i don't sweat like a river (some places its hard getting into the metro, dont u agree?) because of the heater.. and then, spending another minutes getting all the clothes back just to go out through the street's corner ...

    (brazilian version of being in the cold)

    btw, congrats 4 the blog "D